The Waiter And The Porter And The Upstairs Maid Chords

Lyrics & chords

[Verse 1]
[G]As [Em]your [C]ge[D]nial[A] h[D]ost,[C]
may I offer a toast
To the wine [G]-buying [C]guest on my right
[A]Hooray [D]for the wine -buyer!
Yes, drag out [C]the cookin' sherry
for [D]the old colonel
May his [G]bank account
[C]grow heavy -laden with dough
May he spend [D]it in here [A]every [D]night
Every night
See[G]ing this night [B]in [Em]its glory,
you people so [B]loyal, [Em]so true,
puts me in [Eb]mind of [D]a story.
[Em]Tell us about [A]it, pray [D]do.
The people [G]in the ballroom
[Am]were [Em]stuffy and [C]arty,
[Am]so I[G] beg[Em]an to get just a little bit afraid.
[D]I sne[G]aked into the kit[Am]chen.
I [Em]dug [G]me a party
[C]the [G]waiter and the [Em]porter
and the second [C]story made
[D]I pee[G]ked into the parlor
[Am]to s[G]ee what was a ha[C]tching in ti[G]me
to hear the [Em]hostess sug[A]gest a charade
[D]But who[G] was in the pan[Am]try
a [C]laughing and scratching?
[D]wai[G]t and the bor[Em]der and the upstairs[D]
[G]When they hea[D]rd the mus[G]ic
that the [D]orchestra played
[C]the waiter and the porter
grabbed a hold of the maid
[Em]Then they all proceeded to go into a clog
[E]A d[Em]iggity -dog[D]
[Em]If e[G]ver I'[C]m invited to
some [Em]fuddy [G]-duddy's
[D]I ain[G]'t a -go[Em]nna watch
any harlequin [D]-ade
You'll [G]find him in the [C]kitchen
applaud[G]ing his buddies
[C]The waiter [G]and the [Em]porter
and the upstair[D]s man
[G][Eb][C]
Well, pardon me, folks,
the roast [Em]is carved
The [C]wine is served while
you look half [G]-starved
Par[C]don me, sir, may [G]we be free
[Em]The [Am]kitchen guard is having a jam[A]bor[D]
[G]ee[C][Eb][G][C]
[Eb]
[D]I w[G]ent and g[C]ot a dishpan
to use as a thimble
The [G]porter found a [Em]regular
glass that [C]he [D]played
The [G]fingers [C]of the waiter
were each in a thimble
He [G]should have heard the music
[Em]that the combina[D]tion [Em]made
[C][Em][C][B][Em][C]
[Em][B][Em]
[G]Marching through the kitchen
to the pantry and back
[C]Why, man, you should have seen us,
we were ballin' with Jack
Once a half an hour passed
without [Em]any call
[E]Jack, we [D]had a ball
[C]The[G] waltzes and[C] mazurkas,
we hate them, we spurn [D]them,
we [G]got a [Em]lot of rhythms,
we [C]want to [A]hear play, [D]yes,
and [G]we know [C]who to go to
when we [G]want to learn them,
the waiter and the porter
[Em]and the upstairs m[D]an.