Uncle Harry chords and lyrics - NOËL COWARD

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[Verse 1]
[D]Our [G]fam[C] il[B] ie[Em]s[D][G][C]
[G]have traditio[Bm]ns,
we've heard them a [D]thou[G]sand times.
Our ancestors were
unequivocally [D]right.[E]
[D]They frequently went on missio[Bm]ns, to very peculiar cla[E]ns,
to lead the [Am]wretched [D]heathen to the [G]light.[C]
[G]Though some of [B]them were beaten up and some of [Em]them stampeded,
though quite a lot [A]were eaten up, a [D]few of them succeeded.
On [G]one of these expedi[Bm]tions,
an uncle we [D]thought a [E]bore,
Turned out to [Em]be more spirited than [A]ever
he'd been be[D]fore.[C][Em][D]
Poor
Uncle
Harry wanted [G]to be a missionary,
[C]So he took a [D]ship and [G]sailed away.[C][D]
[G]This [D]visionary, hotly [G]pursued by dear
Aunt
Mary,
[C]Found a
South
Sea [D]isle on which to [G]stay.
[F]The nat[Bb] ives greeted them kindly
and invited [F]them to [Bb]dine
On [G]yams and clams and human
hams and [D]vintage coconut [G]wine
The [Eb]taste of which was filthy,
but the [A]after -effects divine
[D]Poor
Uncle
Harry got [G]a bit gay and longed to tarry
[C]This
Aunt
Mary [B]couldn't quite al[Em]low
[G]She lectured him severely on
a number of [D]church affair[G]s
But [C]when she'd gone to bed he
[D]made a getaway down the [G]stairs
For he longed to hear the [C]answer to a
[B]few of the maiden's [Em]prayers
Uncle
Harry's not a mission[G]ary [D]now[G]
[D]Now
Uncle was [G]just a [Bm]seeker,
a [G]dreamer [Em]sin cerely blessed.
[G]Of this there couldn't
be a shadow of [D]doubt.
The fact that his flesh was [Bm]weaker than even our merry
[E]guests took [A]even [Am]her some [D]time to figure [G]out[C].
[G]In all those lan[B]guid latitudes,
the atmosphere's [Em]exotic.
To take up moral atti[A]tudes would
[D]be too idiotic.
Though [G]nobody could be
[Bm]meeker than
Uncle had [D]been be[E]fore,
I'll [Am]bet today he's giving [A]way at practically every [D]pore.[Am][G][Em][D][E]
[D]
Poor
Uncle
Harry, hav[G]ing become a missionary,
found [C]the natives' [D]morals rather [G]crude.[D]
[G]He and
[D]Aunt
Mary swiftly [G]imposed an arbitrary [C]ban
upon them [D]shopping in the [G]mew.
[F]They all[Bb] considered this silly and
de[F]cided to [Bb]rebel.
They [G]burnt his boots and several suits,
which [D]made a horrible smell.
[Em]The subt[Eb]le implication was that
[A]Uncle could go to [D]hell.
Poor
Uncle
Harry, af[G]ter some words with dear
Aunt
Mary,
[C]thought the time had [B]come to
make [Em]a round.[C]
[G]He lined up all the older gir[B]ls
[D]in one of the local [G]sheds,
but [C]while he was revil[B]ing them and
[D]tearing himself to [G]shreds,
they took their mother -hub[C]bards off
and [B]tied them around their [Em]heads.
Uncle
Harry's not a mission[D]ary now.[G][D]
Poor
Uncle
Harry, [G]after some tears from dear
Aunt
Mary,
[C]called upon the [B]chiefs for a pow [C]-wow.
[G]They didn't brandis[C]h knives at [G]him,
they [D]really were awfully [G]sweet.
They [C]made concerted [B]di ves at
[G]him and [D]offered him things to [G]eat.
But when they threw their [C]wives at him,
he [B]had to admit defeat.
[Em]Uncle
Harry's not a mission[G]ary now.
He's awfully happy,
but he's [A]certainly not a missionary [D]now.[G][C][G]