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The Buffoon And The Valedictorian chords and lyrics - ADAM SANDLER
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[Verse 1] Performed by Adam [D]Sandler and Jennifer Lien "And now the buf [Em]foon's date at the drive- [D]in with the [E]school's valedictorian." [Em]Va ledictorian: "I really appreciate y[B]ou're asking me out. Most [E]people are intimidated [Em]by my high academic achievement." [E]Buffoon: "This movie sucks shit!" Valedictorian: "Well, Ebel gave it thumbs up, but Ciscel thought it was too preachy. Anyway, I enjoyed [A]the director's last film [Em]immensly." Buffoon: "Cathleen Turner has big fuck[E]in' tits!" Valedictorian: "Yes, well, [Em]she recently had a [E]child. I think her maternal biology may play a role in that. She looks fabulous for a woman her age, doesn't she?" Buffoon: "I put a firecracker in a bullfrog's mouth and blew [D]his fuckin' head off." Valedictorian: "Well, in psychology we learned that it is not uncom[B]mon for male [E]adoles cents to commit savage acts on animals as part of [A]their maturing pro[E]cess." [Em]Buffoon: "That girl in [E]the fucking car in front of us, she gives everybody head." [D]Valedictorian: "Well, I guess she's str[E]ong for attention and she feels promiscuity is the only way to [D]ob tain it." [E](Buffoon eating popcorn) Buffoon: "This popcorn's fuckin' terrible. It tastes like someone jizzed all over it." (Buffoon continues to eat popcorn) Valedictorian: "Well the amount of semen on this popcorn is certainly disturbing. Perhaps the staff in the refreshment stand was overcome by the monotony of their work and decided to play a childish prank." Buffoon: "I looked at my asshole in [D]the mirror today. It blew my fuckin' mind!" Valedictorian: "It's ironic that parts of one's body [Em]seems odd and u[E]nusu al because you don't see them on a day to day basis. Buffoon: "My father's [Em]shit stinks up the [D]bathroom all [E]fuckin' day!" Valedictorian: "It's puzzling [D]why one person's fecal odor can be [E]more overpowering [A]than another's. [D]I wonder whether it is a function of the food diges[Em]ted or that person's internal met[E]abolism." Buffoon: "I'm gonna go get [B]head from that [D]fuckin' girl." [E](Gets out of the car) Valedictorian: "Well, I'm sorry to see the date come to such an abrubt conclusion." (Buffoon walking away) "I do appreciate the time you [D]spent with me and look forward [Em]to a future [D]rondevue." Buffoon: "I like to piss in that guy's fuckin' gas [D]tank!" Valedictorian: [Em]"Bye bye! Have [E]fun."[C#m] [E][G] (Buffoon continues to walk away)
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